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Archive for May, 2010


A few weeks ago I go to this one house, and after I give the woman her food, she asks me “Can I tip you?” I told her yes, of course, and she says, “I know a lot of places don’t let there delivery people accept tips any more.” Umm, no, that’s complete and utter bullshit. She should have just told me she was a cheap bitch and left it at that. I knew it, she knew it, but she was trying to talk me out of taking the $2 she wound up giving me for the $45 of food I delivered to her quickly. Let’s do the math: 200/45=4.44444444, I may have added or missed a few 4’s there, but you get the idea. A 4 1/2 percent tip for delivering food in my car using my gas in a timely manner while it’s hot is an insult. People will give a waiter who goes from the kitchen to the table 15 percent. What’s up with that? CHEAP! I hate cheap people.

The Driver (Adam Smith)

© Adam Smith and drivershout.wordpress.com, 2009. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Adam Smith and drivershout.wordpress.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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“Kick Rocks” Pizza Delivery Nightmares by Adam Smith is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

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Most of these addresses are customers in Trumbull, unless otherwise specified. If you’re on this list, you’re a cheap asshole who has no regard for the work we do, the danger we face on the roads, and I sincerely hope you aren’t as much of a cheap loser when you go out to a restaurant. May 100,000 stomach aches plague you for your stinginess.

Cheap Customers
44 Spinning Wheel Road: $40 order, $1.45 tip.
58 Mooreland: $60 order, $2 tip.
10222 Avalon Gates: $32 order, $2 tip.
32 Reiner Drive: $94 order, $5 tip.
8 Meadow Ridge: $80 order, $5 tip.
23 Morningside, Easton, two towns away: $40, always $2 tip.
47 Scenic Hill: $24 order, $1.75 tip.
15 Corporate Drive, across town for $2 tip on $25 order.
64 Evelyn, no lights $30 order, $2 tip.
27 Maple St: $35 order, $1.50 tip.
17 Nichols Farm Road: $33 order, $2 tip, huge house.
106 Oakridge: $91 order, $5 tip.
44 Plymouth: $60 order, $3 tip. 12 miles round trip.
25 Gorham Place: $22 order, $0 tip. Thank you doesn’t pay for my gas.
23 Laurel Drive: $30 order, $3 tip. 10 miles round trip.
3090 Reservoir: $17 order, 86 cents for a tip, made me wait 10 minutes.
16 Valley View: $43 order, $1 tip.
39 Pemberton: $50 order, $2 tip.
15 Rock Spring Road: $50 order, $3 tip. Always.
82 Lance Circle: $51 order, $3 tip
23 Doe Hollow: $30 order, 36 cent tip. Assholes
50 Greenwood Drive: $45 order, $1.50 tip, 12 miles round trip.
Louis Muniz School: $105 order, 5 cent tip. Fucking losers.
47 Nelson Terrace: $20 order, no tip.
2600 Park Avenue Fairfield, $15 order, $2 tip, but really far
1225 Cutspring Road Stratford: $70 order, $3 tip, 10 miles round trip
15 Hilsboro Road: $40 order, no tip. Fucktards
175 Isinglas Road Shelton: $30 order, $0 tip. Losers.
55290 Park Ave, Suite 204, Hair salon: $40 order, 17 cent tip. I’m going to get my hair done at your place sometime and return that 17 cent tip.
95 Aspen Lane: $70 order, $5 tip
Bridgeport Tax Collector’s Office: $65 order, $5 tip+ called and said I spilled the sauce and was extremely rude. BULLSHIT. I’m always nice because I want tip money morons.
35 Candlewood: Got $1.50 tip on a $45 order. These people usually either tip a quarter, or have exact change, leaving you with nothing.

The Driver (Adam Smith)

© Adam Smith and drivershout.wordpress.com, 2009. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Adam Smith and drivershout.wordpress.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Page copy protected against web site content infringement by Copyscape

Creative Commons License
“Kick Rocks” Pizza Delivery Nightmares by Adam Smith is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

Email "The Driver"

Read Full Post »

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